Seriously...My wife Amy and I still go back and forth about our summer Hebrew class. I took it for a grade, she took it pass/fail. I studied like crazy, going over flashcards at breakfast, etc. She did just enough. I got put in what our prof called "the gunners" precept and she was in one of "the survivors" precepts. She got her P. I got my high A. And now, several decades later...do either of us remember significantly more Hebrew than the other? Nope.
Oh the flashbacks! 😳 How helpful were Bible Trivia and the Standard Ordination Exams to my ministry? Not very. What made the difference? Mentors, colleagues, experience (learning by the seat of your pants!) to name a few things. As C. S. Lewis once said, “Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn, my God do you learn.” Thanks for the trip down memory lane! Now I’m going to find a cup of coffee before attending a retreat in Atlanta 😉
The 75% effort is the secret to my success in one particular area. My younger faster running friends always marvel at a guy my age (66) who runs over 70 miles per week but never gets hurt. The number one rule is I never give max effort. Of course there are nuances in circumstances when 100% effort is a must but for a lot of things, enough is really enough. Thanks for the sage advice, MaryAnn.
This is so me. I was the valedictorian of my college graduating class and I never get to tell anyone! 🤣 I think I'm going to like it here in the Blue Room. 💙
As an overachieving slacker, I find that the part where we actually talk about “what success looks like” super helpful. I definitely nailed the BCE at 70. But aiming for what I thought was B or C work in seminary often yielded A’s.
There’s the bar/rubric in my head & the one in the evaluator’s… and without clarity going into the project, well, it’s hard to calibrate effort and outcome with expectations.
Apply that to the real pastoring world, where everyone has a different rubric for what the pastor does/is, and I am forever over- and under- and whelming people with my efforts in any given aspect of the role. That’s fun. 😏
And. The best I can manage on any given day within the constraints that day brings is always going to have to be good enough (even if it’s not the best I could ever manage).
Wow! I got a 68 on the BCE the first time and a 73 the second time. Thankfully, I did much better on the next 4 ords. I appreciate this perspective. And, as a 1, I continue to remind myself of the wisdom my mom (a DCE herself) passed along from her supervising pastor. After a glowing annual review she expressed her surprise at the positive feedback and disappointment in herself. He assured her that she was likely the only one who knew she could have done more. No one missed the one more center she had originally planned to have at the workshop. No one noticed that she didn’t spend a little extra time on that one lesson… so let go of it and be okay with good enough. I have to remind myself of that all the time. And I still think that if I do that I’ll end up with the 68 instead of the 73- close, but still falling short.
In related news- I chose “gentle” for my word this year.
Oh a memory rides in me before finishing my coffee!! Statistics-required in pharmacy school. Courting a solid A average but could not wrap my brain around stats and barely makjng a C-. My mom told me D was fine- no one would care-go to bed! She was so right! No one did. Great career in corporate healthcare and hired other people who loved Excel!
I like to think and do in terms of optimizing rather than maximizing. A small difference in words and a large difference in my life results. Elizabeth strikes me as an optimizer. (Could not resist the comment) :)
This also reminds me of something my sister-in-law’s medical school professor told her: “B = MD”
(feeling seen)
Seriously...My wife Amy and I still go back and forth about our summer Hebrew class. I took it for a grade, she took it pass/fail. I studied like crazy, going over flashcards at breakfast, etc. She did just enough. I got put in what our prof called "the gunners" precept and she was in one of "the survivors" precepts. She got her P. I got my high A. And now, several decades later...do either of us remember significantly more Hebrew than the other? Nope.
Oh the flashbacks! 😳 How helpful were Bible Trivia and the Standard Ordination Exams to my ministry? Not very. What made the difference? Mentors, colleagues, experience (learning by the seat of your pants!) to name a few things. As C. S. Lewis once said, “Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn, my God do you learn.” Thanks for the trip down memory lane! Now I’m going to find a cup of coffee before attending a retreat in Atlanta 😉
The 75% effort is the secret to my success in one particular area. My younger faster running friends always marvel at a guy my age (66) who runs over 70 miles per week but never gets hurt. The number one rule is I never give max effort. Of course there are nuances in circumstances when 100% effort is a must but for a lot of things, enough is really enough. Thanks for the sage advice, MaryAnn.
It's often hard to recognize "enough" but it feels pretty damned good when you do!
Might have to do that Enneagram, just for the chuckle . . . ;)
So very true!! Thanks for this reminder of what matters!
This is so me. I was the valedictorian of my college graduating class and I never get to tell anyone! 🤣 I think I'm going to like it here in the Blue Room. 💙
As an overachieving slacker, I find that the part where we actually talk about “what success looks like” super helpful. I definitely nailed the BCE at 70. But aiming for what I thought was B or C work in seminary often yielded A’s.
There’s the bar/rubric in my head & the one in the evaluator’s… and without clarity going into the project, well, it’s hard to calibrate effort and outcome with expectations.
Apply that to the real pastoring world, where everyone has a different rubric for what the pastor does/is, and I am forever over- and under- and whelming people with my efforts in any given aspect of the role. That’s fun. 😏
And. The best I can manage on any given day within the constraints that day brings is always going to have to be good enough (even if it’s not the best I could ever manage).
As a 3 (on the Enneagram - not out of 10) this is helpful to read
Wow! I got a 68 on the BCE the first time and a 73 the second time. Thankfully, I did much better on the next 4 ords. I appreciate this perspective. And, as a 1, I continue to remind myself of the wisdom my mom (a DCE herself) passed along from her supervising pastor. After a glowing annual review she expressed her surprise at the positive feedback and disappointment in herself. He assured her that she was likely the only one who knew she could have done more. No one missed the one more center she had originally planned to have at the workshop. No one noticed that she didn’t spend a little extra time on that one lesson… so let go of it and be okay with good enough. I have to remind myself of that all the time. And I still think that if I do that I’ll end up with the 68 instead of the 73- close, but still falling short.
In related news- I chose “gentle” for my word this year.
Oh a memory rides in me before finishing my coffee!! Statistics-required in pharmacy school. Courting a solid A average but could not wrap my brain around stats and barely makjng a C-. My mom told me D was fine- no one would care-go to bed! She was so right! No one did. Great career in corporate healthcare and hired other people who loved Excel!
I like to think and do in terms of optimizing rather than maximizing. A small difference in words and a large difference in my life results. Elizabeth strikes me as an optimizer. (Could not resist the comment) :)